On Thanksgiving

It is Thanksgiving weekend (up here in Canada anyways).  As I sit in Starbucks to catch up on my blog (once again; really have to work on writing more often!), it is amazing how busy it is here today, as opposed to the usual weekends that I am in here.  My guess as to why is because it is a beautiful, sunny Fall day outside today, a long weekend, as well as people are out spending the day with their family for the holiday anyways, so why not make a stop in at Starbucks along the way?  Even though it might make it a little more cramped and loud in here, it is nice to see.  I like to people watch.  It is a mix of all kinds of people from all walks of life; older people, younger people, parents with children, grandparents with grandchildren, pets, etc.  Everyone seems a little bit more cheerful and courteous as well.  I think that is one of my favorite things about the holidays.  You see more smiling faces and more good deeds done than at any other time of the year.

This Thanksgiving, in light of my reflection on the events in my life this year so far, I am once again so thankful for the family and friends that I am surrounded with who are there to pick me up when I fall and to cheer me on in my goals and successes.  I am also thankful for my health and the healthy path that I have been on that started earlier this year, my two cats that keep me from feeling completely lonely on those extra lonely days, the great apartment that I found earlier this year in the beautiful city of White Rock, BC, the stable job that I have had since 2011, and the ability to grow and enrich my life by having options out there that I am able to pursue (once I finally figure out which way my heart and soul is leading me!), just to name a few.

I am also thankful for the instant connection that I felt when I first went to the Winnipeg Art Gallery years ago with my Mother (thanks Mom!) to see the Marilyn Monroe collection, and also the one-woman show afterwards depicting snippets of Marilyn’s life, which brought tears to my eyes.  I felt this connection as I could relate to her life in many ways, which I’ve already mentioned in my previous blog posts, so I won’t go into them again here.  I have found that it is hard to find those connections in this life; whether girl friends, boyfriends, family, co-workers, etc.  So to find a connection in any way, even with someone who has passed on before my time, is something to be thankful for.  No matter how hard I try to disbelieve this truth, because of the hurts that I have experienced and also have witnessed others experience, it is nevertheless an ultimate truth of life: You can’t make it through this life alone.  The human race needs connections with other humans to survive.  

So, on this Thanksgiving weekend I am thankful for all of the varied connections that I have made and will continue to make in my life, with both people and animals.  I couldn’t make it through this roller coaster of life without them.

In Continual Gratitude,

Laura

 

Image

Life’s Support Systems

As you can probably tell from no posts from me for the last 2 months, I’ve been a bit busy these days.  Busy with some good things, but some bad as well.  Not the worst things that could happen in someone’s life, but definitely not the best.  I feel like I’ve been 3 rounds with Tyson right about now; emotionally and mentally.  Worn out and needing some perspective and relaxation.  Such is life I guess.

I don’t want to waste this post on focusing on the negative though.  Trying to come out of that ‘hole’ is hard enough.  I will focus on writing about the absolute importance of family and friends in life; especially to help guide you through those dark times that inevitably arise in life.  I really don’t know how I would make it through these times without the support of these special people.  They love unconditionally and without judgment.

I have always been very close with my family.  It most likely stems from the time when my father left when I was 15 years old and I had to help my Mom raise my 3 younger siblings.  That experience made me grow up really quickly and bonded me to all of them even closer.  I feel like I am a second mother figure to my siblings, as well as being the older sister, and me and my Mom are very close from this experience as well.

I don’t have a ton of friends, but the friends I do have, are very close and I know that they would be there for me through anything, as I would for them.  I have friends from back in high school as well as friends that I’ve met over the past few years.  I treasure them all immensely.

Having all of these wonderful people in my life has been such a blessing and I don’t know how I would survive this crazy thing called life without their love and support.  I only wish that Marilyn would have had the kind of support from the people around her in her short life that I have.  She unfortunately started out her life with a mother that was incapable of taking care of her, as she had Schizophrenia.  She lived in and out of foster homes from there.  She also did not have true friends around her throughout her life either.  They all seemed to be her ‘friend’ for selfish reasons of their own.  She was constantly lonely which greatly contributed to her abuse of alcohol and prescription drugs, which eventually contributed to claiming her life.  If I was around in Marilyn’s time, I would have definitely been a great friend to her.

If you take anything away from this post of mine, please don’t take the great people in your life for granted.  Give them an extra hug or kiss.  They definitely deserve it.

XOXO to my wonderful family and friends.

Laura

66936_442538123196_761103196_5288696_6596367_n

The Meaning of Life?

Well, I’m not feeling too creative or insightful today, but here goes nothing.  Writing is a form of therapy, right? 🙂

The last month or so has definitely been a bumpy road for me.  Went through a tough breakup, losing hope with trying to find a new place to live, struggling financially, etc.  Basically, I feel like I’m just kind of floating through life; no purpose, no vision, no anything really.  Just a constant struggle.  I really truly would like to change that, and I am really trying, but it’s definitely tough.  I know that I’m not alone in this, so that does give me some comfort.  I’m sure Marilyn struggled with this in her short life as well, with being seen as mostly a ‘dumb blond’ whose only real talent was being a sexual creature.  I’m sure that’s a big part of why she drank and took pills so often, to ‘escape’ from that reality.

I just don’t understand; why does life seem to have to be such a struggle?  Is it that hard to just be happy and not have to constantly struggle?  I do truly believe that if you are able to change the way you think about things, your world can definitely change.  I just find this so difficult to achieve, so far anyways.  I guess it takes a lot of time and patience to develop new habits of ways of thinking, especially after thinking a certain way for 30+ years.  You really don’t realize how many negative and self-defeating thoughts pop into your head on a daily basis until you start being more aware and ‘catching’ yourself.  It’s pretty eye-opening!  So while I know that I am on the right path, and have many great family and friends around me for support and encouragement, I feel that I have a long way to go still.  It can be daunting many days, but I can feel good about the path that I’m on now, no matter how long it will take me to get where I’d like to be: CONTENT.

I guess I have more questions than answers in my post today.  Please feel free to share your thoughts and/or personal experiences as a comment on my post today so that we all don’t feel so alone on our own personal journeys in this crazy world sometimes. 🙂

XOXO

Laura

57945_430188228196_761103196_5035976_5464384_n

Post Valentine’s Day Thoughts

The day after Valentine’s Day.  For some, Valentine’s Day is the most romantic day of the year, and they anxiously await what might be in store for them on this sacred day.  For others, it is a manufactured holiday to milk yet more hard-earned dollars from people that are pressured to make sure to acknowledge their love in a big way on this one day.  For single people, it might be just another reminder that they are alone and something is ‘wrong’ with them for not being able to find their ‘soul mate’ yet.  I guess I would be a mixture of both sides, as I usually tend to be on most things.  I don’t like the manufactured holiday aspect of it, but I do like that it is a reminder to express to your loved ones (not necessarily through material things) how much you love them, and also to remember to do it more often than only once per year. Continue reading